I'm doing this to express my creativity without offending my mother on facebook.
I've realised that a stream of consciousness is more effective in determining my true goal than belabouring the point with ideas and possibilities.
I've been obsessed with not living up to the standards that I think have been set for me. I wonder if I'm truly beautiful. Truly smart. And truly talented. I am interested to see if I can really change who I am.
Who I am has been an hindrance to me my whole life. The idea that I could possibly reinvent myself. Be someone I was never supposed to be. To be able to change from within, and then have an effect on the world around me is what I've always wanted. I've been focusing however on changing the outside. I will be posting some photos of myself at my most unfit and out of shape. As the program I will develop to change my body takes place, I will be posting more photos documenting my progress.

but right now -- these are all empty promises. I am sitting in my bed, filling my lungs up, and wishing for a different life. The biggest hurdle for this blog -- is to live up to the title.
Advancements in Perfection

ad·vance·ment

Pronunciation:

\əd-ˈvan(t)-smənt\

Function:

noun

Date:

1553

1: the action of advancing : the state of being advanced: a: promotion or elevation to a higher rank or position b: progression to a higher stage of development
2: an improved feature : improvement

A higher stage of developing my own perfection. My title suggests that this is about the JOURNEY not the destination. and today -- the journey is slow going.


real quick

being perfect to me is

being happy in my own skin for everything I am and being proud of what I am.

(I can say that I already feel this way)

being in control of my own mental illnesses

(this isn't the case, and it makes the first attribute of perfection null and void, despite actually being grounded in happiness and self love - I know how to trick myself into thinking the opposite)

confident,
savvy,
funny,
talented,
cool,
generous,
a leader,
creative,
empathetic,
caring,
and sexy.

I'd like to be rid of the need for validation. I would be so much more of the above attributes, if I didn't need people outside of me to validate what I already know I am.

I'd like to be stronger. Leaner. Less fat. More in control of what I ate. How my body is managed and maintained.



Here's to seeing how far I'll take things.